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Visiting Churches

Reflections on 52 Churches

Wrapping Up Our Year of Visiting Churches

Our journey of visiting fifty-two churches is over, though the memories will last forever. With much to consider, this wrap-up pulls together key elements of our adventure.

I hope this helps you and your church better interact with and respond to visitors, as well as find new ways to connect with and serve God.

Here are some of my thoughts and reflections on 52 Churches.

Format and Size Matters

In our pilgrimage we found smaller churches (those under fifty people) generally offered more opportunity to make connections, with meaningful community apparent. But I grew weary of the ultra-small gatherings (those under twenty).

Their miniscule size made Sunday worship a struggle, and there’s little hope for their future. Without God’s supernatural intervention, they’ll plod along until their minister can no longer serve or until most of the remaining members die.

Surely, they won’t last the decade.

We also discovered that most liturgical churches—sometimes called high churches—weren’t friendly.

Though there were exceptions, the norm at these gatherings was no interaction with other attendees, not before, during, or after the service. And if anyone made contact it was often a rote effort with a disingenuous air.

This isn’t to imply non-liturgical churches—sometimes called low churches—were friendly. Though many were, some also kept visitors at a stoic distance.

Friendliness is a partner to community. At larger churches (those over a couple hundred), community presents a challenge, while anonymity unfolds with ease.

Without concerted effort we would remain a part of the unnoticed masses at these larger gatherings. Though some people prefer to slip in and slip out of church unseen, interacting with no one, what’s the point of going?

The same outcome—perhaps a better one—could result by sitting at home in front of the TV.

At smaller churches, anonymity is impossible. Although experiencing community is much more likely, there’s no guarantee, either. Arriving and leaving stealthily can’t happen, but what’s key is how they handle their visitors.

Some churches do this gracefully, bordering on celebration, while others have an awkwardness that produces squirming and embarrassment.

Granted, I’m an introvert—as is 51 to 74 percent of the population, depending on who you ask—so my extroverted counterparts may think differently.

For medium-sized churches (fifty to two hundred), some acted with large church anonymity, while others retained small church connection.

Generalizations

As already mentioned, we found liturgical churches less friendly and not as interested in fostering community, with charismatic congregations being the most embracing—even though their theology was often the most exclusive.

Likewise, larger churches struggled to personally welcome us as visitors, whereas this was less of a problem at smaller churches.

Churches with a more traditional service tended to have older congregations, whereas churches with a contemporary service skewed younger, being either completely youthful or having a good cross-section of ages.

At many churches we were among the youngest present, while at a few, we were among the oldest. When the entire congregation is over sixty-five, their future as a viable church seems bleak.

After only a few weeks of visiting, I developed a knack for predicting the type of service based solely on the appearance of the sanctuary: its condition and trappings.

Likewise, the age of the congregation and how they dressed were also sufficient to gauge the type of service we would see. At only two churches did I judge incorrectly (Church #19 and Church #45).

One observation was particularly disconcerting: Churches with older congregations and traditional services tended to be friendlier than at contemporary services with younger people.

This held true even within churches that offered both styles of service. What I’m not sure of is if the primary factor was the age of the congregation or the style of the service, because the two seem interconnected.

Last, based on a prior bad stint at an ultra-conservative Baptist church, I expected the Baptist churches we visited would be dogmatic, closed-minded, and exclusive.

I’m pleased to say that, with one exception, this didn’t prove true, although I’m dismayed that we did witness dogmatic, closed-minded, exclusive attitudes at some of the charismatic churches we visited.

This shocked me because I understood this was an old-school mindset, with the current charismatic perspective being more theologically inclusive and open-minded.

[Check out the discussion questions for this post for our overall reflections and .thoughts about church size and format.]

My wife and I visited a different Christian Church every Sunday for a year. This is our story. Get your copy of 52 Churches today, available in ebook, paperback, hardcover, and audiobook.

Peter DeHaan writes about biblical Christianity to confront status quo religion and live a life that matters. He seeks a fresh approach to following Jesus through the lens of Scripture, without the baggage of made-up traditions and meaningless practices.

Read more in his books, blog, and weekly email updates.

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Visiting Churches

The Home Stretch

Wrapping Up Our Journey of Visiting 52 Churches in a Year

We’ve just completed a stint of visiting churches in three specific geographic areas. Now our focus shifts to a fourth: the churches to the east of us. We’re on the home stretch of visiting 52 churches in a year.

We’ve already visited eight of them (Churches #9, 11, 13, 15, 20, 24, 25, and 26) with scores more remaining, but we only have seven weeks to squeeze them in. We strategically select which ones we’ll visit, skipping the rest—at least for now.

Our journey is winding down. I have mixed feelings. Visiting a different church each Sunday has been fun, enlightening, and educational.

Already, I’m lamenting that our adventure will soon end. We must skip many churches, with dozens more that, although further away than ten miles, would be illuminating to visit.

But I’m anxious to return home, to revisit the familiar and reconnect with friends. The pull of reunion is powerful.

Our journey has worn on us. Every week we must plan where to go, confirm service times, and verify their location. Each Saturday night we go to bed asking, “What time is church tomorrow?”

Our schedule for the entire day hinges on the answer. We hope we’ll remember the right time and not be late. And even though you’d think I’d find visiting churches easy by now, I’m still anxious every Sunday morning.

Takeaway for Everyone: Remember that visiting a church is hard. Do everything you can to embrace visitors.

Part Four Perspective

To wrap up our adventure, we visited some of the churches (#45–52) on the western side of the area’s largest city.

Our home church, Church #53 (Home for Holy Week), which we returned to for Easter, is also in this city, located in the downtown area, but it falls outside of our ten-mile criteria at eleven miles away—and a twenty-one-minute drive.

With many more churches on our list than the number of Sundays left, it was hard to pick which ones to include. Our decisions involved much discussion between Candy and myself, a bit of give and take, and a couple of last-minute changes.

We picked churches which would provide the most varied experiences for this phase. Church #51 (The Megachurch) is our area’s largest, with #52 (Playing it Safe) and #49 (Large and Anonymous) being close behind.

These comprised our extra-large church encounters, offering insight into the pros and cons of “big.”

On the other end of the size spectrum was one small congregation, Church #48 (Small, Simple, and Satisfying) and one medium-sized congregation, Church #47 (Significant Interactions).

The rest of the churches were large congregations. Church #46 (False Assumptions) had a huge facility—suggesting a once prosperous past—but it now has barely enough attendees to fit the large category.

The other two sizable churches were Church #45 (Another Doubleheader) and Church #50 (Saturday Mass).

We included Saturday mass for multiple reasons: another Roman Catholic encounter, a church with a campus connection, and a Saturday night service.

We doubled up that weekend and one other, when we went to a Seventh Day Adventist Church (Church #31, A Day of Contrasts) on Saturday, and an Episcopal Church (Church #32, Commitment Sunday) the next day.

Although it would have been possible to double up and visit two different churches on Sunday mornings, we opted not to do so as it taxed us to go to two Sunday services at the same church.

By going to church on two Saturdays, as well as every Sunday, we were able to complete our fifty-two-church journey in fifty weeks, allowing us to return to our home church for Easter.

On this, the final phase of our journey, my thoughts center on church size, with my overarching concern for community hovering in the background. I claim I want to attend a small church, one with a close-knit and spiritually-significant community.

Yet, my actions belie that as our home church is a large one, bordering on extra-large. Also, and ironically, of the fifty-two churches we visited, Church #51 (The Megachurch) appeals to me the most.

The reason I don’t warm up to most smaller churches—the ones I claim I want to attend—is that they’re frequently older congregations. They have traditional services, don’t embrace newer methods, and are composed of aging parishioners.

I’ve often criticized older congregations, but I’m not against older people. I’m concerned for people who coast toward the finish line, hoping to hang on to the status quo until they go to heaven.

Their focus is on maintaining what they have, not expanding their church or preparing it for the next generation. Yes, they say they want their congregation to grow, but it’s often little more than a hope.

In vain, they expect that if they keep doing what they’ve always done, they will one day gain members. These congregations seldom do something different to attract new people.

Even though using newer practices might help embrace visitors, that would make the people of the church uncomfortable. And comfort, as they drift toward life’s end, is what they seek.

Though there are certainly exceptions, this is the attitude in most older congregations.

That brings me to Church #48 (Small, Simple, and Satisfying). By far the smallest church on the final leg of our journey, and one of the smallest overall, this church holds great appeal.

They earn high marks for conducting their service without the help of paid clergy or a guest speaker, which they did with excellence. They improved many aspects of a typical church experience.

This includes the placement of the cross, how they communicate announcements, the congregation praying without first sharing their needs, many members being involved in the service, and the easy, informal fellowship time afterward.

I assume these are all intentional tweaks made to maximize worship and strengthen community. They possessed a real sense of family, which all churches should have, but too many don’t.

Though the service was more formal than I prefer, it’s easy to overlook, given all the other pluses. My one concern is their future.

Candy and I were among the youngest present, so without an infusion of younger attendees, the church could be serving its final generation.

Though many of these older members are young in their heart, this church offers little to attract a younger crowd who can sustain and perpetuate it.

This isn’t their dilemma alone, but one shared by all the small churches we visited, as well as some medium-sized ones.

If the solution to numeric decline was obvious, churches would pursue it, but the only small churches I’ve ever seen grow are new ones. The established ones keep getting smaller until they close. This isn’t a lament so much as a reality.

The real problem is expectation. A congregation—or even denomination—shouldn’t expect to continue forever. Instead, it’s organic, following an expected life cycle: gestation, birth, growth, plateauing, slowing down, dying, and death.

In fighting this natural progression, members turn their focus away from worship, community, and outreach to concentrate on survival, as if that’s the goal. But it’s not; God is.

Yes, leaders can take steps to lengthen the life of a local church or denomination, but to assume it can—or even should—live forever, misses reality. The only way to last indefinitely is to become an institution.

With religious institutions, the primary focus switches from God to ensuring survival. Paid staff eventually place their continued employment ahead of all else, losing passion for their primary mission.

God isn’t impressed with our religious institutions or the people who strive to sustain them. What he desires are followers who will make a difference, advancing his kingdom for his glory—not their own agenda.

Our Home Church

Although outside our ten-mile requirement and fifty-two-week window, I shared about our home church. What happens there contrasts—often sharply—with many of our church visits.

Although some aspects at a few of the churches were like our home church, none of them matched it.

Our home church remains the lens through which Candy and I evaluate other congregations. Our children did this, too, with their experiences at our home church forming their expectations when they moved and sought a new church.

I’m sad our adventure is over, and at the same time, I’m glad to reconnect with friends and once again establish a regular rhythm to our Sunday worship routine.

Takeaway for Leaders: Individual churches should be organic, with an eventual life cycle that will one day end.

The only way to ensure they last forever is to turn them into a religious institution. Don’t do that.

[Check out the discussion questions for this post as we anticipate what is to come and review what happened.]

My wife and I visited a different Christian Church every Sunday for a year. This is our story. Get your copy of 52 Churches today, available in ebook, paperback, hardcover, and audiobook.

Peter DeHaan writes about biblical Christianity to confront status quo religion and live a life that matters. He seeks a fresh approach to following Jesus through the lens of Scripture, without the baggage of made-up traditions and meaningless practices.

Read more in his books, blog, and weekly email updates.

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Visiting Churches

Visiting 52 Churches, Part Three

A Recap of Churches 27 through 44

The churches are starting to blur. Every week seems the same, offering only slight variations on a theme. I’m growing weary of our journey. I’ve realized this for a few weeks but didn’t want to admit it.

Yes, I still notice kindnesses offered and innovations presented at the various branches of Jesus’s church. But I worry that I notice more the actions that discourage me and disparage the reputation of my savior.

Have I become cynical? Am I truly able to see what God wants me to see?

My prayers before we leave for church lack freshness. Have they become vain repetition? Matthew 6:7 in the KJV says, “But when ye pray, use not vain repetitions, as the heathen do: for they think that they shall be heard for their much speaking.”

My anticipation for the service is no longer as expectant, yet God prevails and teaches me anyway.

For the first half of our journey, I picked our destinations solely by the driving distance from our home.

But heading in different directions each Sunday became disconcerting, making it challenging to synthesize an understanding of congregations within communities.

In retrospect, I should have divided our fifty-two churches into four groups: those within our local school district, those in the village to our west, those in the village to the southwest of us, and those on the western edge of the city to our east.

For the third part of our adventure we focused on the first three of these geographic areas, while remaining within ten miles of our house. This allowed us to better comprehend the churches within their local context.

The village to our west has twenty-one churches. We visited twelve in the first half of our journey, calling on the remaining nine for this phase (Churches #27–36). Together they comprise a wide-ranging group, offering an array of options.

Next, we turned our attention to the village to our southwest, with its five churches (#37–41). Although one was struggling, the other four weren’t.

They were vibrant and growing, each with its unique appeal and offering a different approach to worshiping God.

To conclude this phase of our sojourn, we visited the remaining three churches in our local school district (Churches #42–44).

Along with Churches 1 through 7, these ten churches are noteworthy because our local food pantry serves people living in the school district. Sometimes pantry clients ask me about area churches.

Now that I’ve visited all ten, I can share firsthand information, directing people to the one that best meets their needs and preferences.

Some of our clients attend church outside of the area, and I’ve seen them at several of the gatherings we’ve visited. I have mixed feelings about this.

Part of me wishes each congregation would care for the needs of their own, while the other part of me would decry each church replicating the same program.

Having an area food pantry is not only practical, but it’s also a great community service, with five of the district’s ten churches involved in a truly ecumenical outreach.

Greeting and Community

At the halfway point in our journey, I noted the importance of community, with some churches excelling at it, a few failing, and most falling somewhere in between.

The prelude to community is greeting. Churches that greet well embrace visitors and foster connections.

Liturgical churches, I observed, struggle with greeting and fail at community.

Fortunately, this isn’t an absolute principle, merely a tendency. Church #43 (A Welcoming Church with Much to Offer) and Church #32 (Commitment Sunday and Celebration) proved liturgical churches can greet well and foster meaningful community.

Church #43 excelled at this, perhaps even more so than the non-liturgical Church #22 (A Caring Community). Two other non-liturgical churches that greeted well were Church #38 (A Refreshing Time) and Church #41 (People Make the Difference).

I’d like to revisit them all, simply because of the amazing way they greeted, welcoming us into their community. We made connections. We had relevant conversations. We shared a spiritual camaraderie.

There are three opportunities to greet visitors: before, during, and after the service. Churches need to master all three. Few do, but Church #43 did.

Two churches ignored us beforehand and had no greeting time during the service, but they did embrace us afterward: Church #28 (Intriguing and Liturgical) and Church #35 (A Well-Kept Secret).

But it’s hard to overcome a bad first impression. While Church #28 did, enough so that I want to return, Church #35 didn’t.

The opposite error is not ending well. Church #27 (A Charismatic Experience) ignored us afterward. With no one who approached us and no one available for us to approach, we had two choices: stand there and look pathetic or leave. We left.

Then, one church, a non-liturgical one, failed at all three opportunities: they ignored us. This was Church #31 (A Day of Contrasts). It was as if we were invisible.

Though their service was most impressive, their cold demeanor isolated us, effectively pushing us out the door as soon as the service ended.

Yes, they did have two assigned greeters at the front door, but the personable pair couldn’t overcome the 150 indifferent people inside.

Yes, greeting well is important. Without it, visitors cannot hope to find community. So why would they want to come back?

Highs and Lows of Our Journey

Overall, our time at charismatic gatherings continues to disappoint.

While Church #27 (A Charismatic Experience) came close to providing a true charismatic encounter—or at least my perception of one—they also had some disconcerting shortcomings, including a rambling message and not being friendly.

The narrow doctrine at Church #34 (Acts Chapter Two) and Church #36 (The Surprise) especially dismayed me.

Like Church #14 (The Pentecostal Perspective), they placed an unbiblical emphasis on speaking in tongues, viewing it as a requirement to signify true salvation.

Church #42 (High Expectations and Great Disappointment) went to the opposite extreme, dismissing charismatic followers of Jesus as heretics and doing so with a most dogmatic fervor.

The way these otherwise well-meaning clergy divide Jesus’s church grieves me.

This error, of rejecting other Christians because they fail to meet some personally held opinion, is perhaps the biggest shortcoming we’ve seen at any of the churches.

I wonder if they’ve lost their first love. (Consider John’s stinging rebuke in Revelation 2:4–5 against the church in Ephesus). Do they truly comprehend what it means to follow Jesus? I seriously doubt it.

Conversely, Church #29 (Led by Laity) greatly encouraged me; they conducted their entire service without any clergy. I wish more churches would follow their example.

I beg churches to do so. Through Jesus we are all priests. We shouldn’t need ministers to do for us what we’re supposed to do ourselves. (See 1 Peter 2:5, 9 as a starting point.)

In considering Church #37 (Another Small Church), sometimes a church just needs to close. This church has more people on the outside trying to save it, than there are local people who attend.

Yes, God can do the impossible, but without a clear instruction from him to persevere, the wise action, the prudent option, is to simply shut down and stop wasting resources on an unpromising situation.

Interestingly, there was once local interest for this church to merge with another, but their respective denominations wouldn’t permit it. Their decision was self-serving and not kingdom-focused.

Lastly, some churches, despite many good traits and positive elements, showed us some bizarre practices:

  • Greeting strangers with a holy kiss was creepy, Church #28 (Intriguing and Liturgical).
  • Church #30 (Misdirected and Frustrated) duped us into attending Sunday school and angered me.
  • Avoiding all forms of promotion made them hard to find, Church #35 (A Well-Kept Secret). We stumbled upon them by accident.
  • Cancelling services because the minister was called away disappointed us, Church #36 (The Surprise). Hold services anyway. Church #29 (Led by Laity) did.
  • Having a dirty sanctuary made me reluctant to sit down, Church #37 (Another Small Church). The overall neglected condition of their facility didn’t help.
  • Heading to a restaurant after the service was interesting but unusual. Arming us all with coupons may not have left the best impression on the restaurant staff, Church #39 (A Great Way to End the Year).

Takeaway for Everyone: Set divisive theology aside and celebrate commonality in Jesus. Seek ways to work with other churches, not oppose them.

[Check out the discussion questions for this post about our journey of visiting 52 churches, along with two more questions that precede it.]

My wife and I visited a different Christian Church every Sunday for a year. This is our story. Get your copy of 52 Churches today, available in ebook, paperback, hardcover, and audiobook.

Peter DeHaan writes about biblical Christianity to confront status quo religion and live a life that matters. He seeks a fresh approach to following Jesus through the lens of Scripture, without the baggage of made-up traditions and meaningless practices.

Read more in his books, blog, and weekly email updates.

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Visiting Churches

52 Churches: The Second Quarter

Preparing to Visit Our Next 13 Churches

Going forward in our journey of visiting 52 Churches, we may bypass more churches on our list to vary the scope of our adventure.

So far, we’ve skipped one that wasn’t a Christian gathering and another because they were in limbo, pending a turnaround.

The next thirteen churches on our list promise a wider variation of experience. This excites me. I also see some churches we’ll exclude because they don’t hold much promise for additional variation.

52 Churches: A Yearlong Journey Encountering God, His Church, and Our Common Faith

Our journey is about growth and discovery, not about thoroughly covering every option in a precise order.

Though we have a plan, the plan is flexible.

Takeaway for Everyone: Plan, but be flexible. Fixating on the plan, as well as having no plan, will miss opportunities that arise.

[Check out the discussion questions for this post.]


Part Two Perspective: Churches 14 through 26

We’re now half done with our journey. For the past twenty-six weeks we’ve sought to expand our understanding of how others worship God. I blog about our visit each Monday morning, but friends frequently ask for more.

“What are you learning?”

“That God’s church is more diverse and varied than I ever imagined.”

“Is your journey changing?”

“No. We’re still planning to return to our home church when we’re done.”

“Do you want to revisit any of the churches?”

“Yes.” I start to reel off a list along with my reasons, but they don’t seem interested in the details. Why do they ask if they don’t care about the answers?

Aside from these questions, a sobering realization is that church is not about the teaching or the music. It’s about community.

52 Churches: A Yearlong Journey Encountering God, His Church, and Our Common Faith

We’ve heard messages from gifted speakers and those not-so-talented, the formally trained and the self-taught.

We’ve heard deep thoughts and entertaining fluff. But in all cases, we received a worthwhile word from God. I suspect if we pray expectantly and are open to hear, we will.

Similarly, we’ve sung traditional hymns, modern songs, and contemporary praise choruses. Accomplished vocalists, struggling crooners, and everything in between have led us in worship.

There have been worship bands, pipe organs and pianos, accompaniment tracks, recorded songs, and even a cappella. If we focus on the words, we praise God regardless of musical style.

Nonetheless, message and music, I’m sad to report, aren’t important—not really. The big variable is community. Aside from that often-awkward official greeting time during the service, community is a meaningful time of spiritual interaction with others.

When we make connections with others, we share Jesus. God is more present in these informal exchanges before and after the service than during the planned and prepped moments of the service.

A few churches have no community. People come, people sit, and people leave, without saying a word. This is not church as God intended.

Church #18 (Revisiting Roman Catholicism) had no community. Church #17 (A Doubleheader) and Church #16 (Something’s Missing) had minimal community. They gave us no reason to return.

Fortunately, most churches allow community to some degree and a few excel at it. I want to revisit these churches. Community is church at its best.

4 Standout Churches

Four churches stood out in their embrace of us. Though our visit could have been an anomaly, I suspect all visitors would receive a similar welcome.

Many churches have an official greeter or two and most have a couple of outgoing people who reach out to visitors, but at Church #22 (A Caring Community) it seemed everyone reached out to us.

We met so many people who were genuinely interested in getting to know us. They were sincere, accepting, and engaging.

At Church #25 (Embarking on a Metamorphosis, Part 2), we enjoyed many friendly conversations beforehand, had people invite us to sit with them, and enjoyed significant interaction afterward.

The after-church community at Church #19 (A Near Miss) was also great. We talked with many people, made connections, and learned about their church, ministry philosophy, and vision. It felt as if we were at a family reunion with extended relatives.

At Church #14 (The Pentecostal Perspective) many members of the congregation were friendly. We felt welcomed before and during the service, enjoying spiritually-significant conversations.

Unfortunately, their narrow theology placed us on the outside. They would never fully accept us into their community.

Receiving honorable mention are the two minority congregations: Church #26 (An Unknown Situation) and Church #20 (Different Language, Same God). Both were extremely friendly, but we failed to make deep connections with anyone at either church.

For the first, this was due to language differences and for the second, cultural differences, though I should note, we weren’t in the target demographic at either church.

Avoid a Consumerism Mentality

A second observation also stems from the preaching and singing. Consumerism is rampant in the modern church. The mantra of many churches, especially the larger ones, is “excellence in everything.”

Doing whatever God calls us to do to the best of our abilities is God-honoring. He deserves nothing less. Unfortunately, pursuing excellence can feed into a consumer mentality.

Many people seek a church with the most engaging speaker and professional musicians.

When they find it, they join that church—and stay there until a better preacher or music comes along. They are church consumers, looking for the best value. They forget about community and never ask what they can give to a church.

I’m not being overly critical. How many times have you heard someone leave a church because “I’m just not being fed anymore”? I’ve heard it, and I’ve even said it. Its cousin is “it’s just not meeting my needs.”

Although both complaints sound sincerely spiritual, they reveal a consumer mindset: “What will church do for me?” If this church can’t meet my needs, I’ll find one that does.

The result is church shopping and church hopping. This isn’t God-honoring, and we should be ashamed.

A third item is church size. Size does matter and bigger isn’t better.

There’s a progression: Excellence in preaching and music triggers a consumer reaction, so churches that excel in these areas attract bigger crowds. They grow and may even become a megachurch.

Connection and Community

From the perspective of structure, resources, programs, staff, and efficiency, bigger churches have a huge advantage. This plays well in today’s society, but it isn’t the purpose of church.

Church is to connect people with God and with each other.

This is hard, if not impossible, to do with any degree of intimacy and integrity at a large church. That’s why they form small groups, promoting smallness within the structure of largeness.

I’m using small groups in a generic sense. The actual labels vary: small groups, life groups, Bible studies, pods, service teams, and fellowship groups.

At the churches with, say, more than two hundred people, no one knows if you’re a visitor and few care. If you want to get lost in a crowd, go to a big church. If you want community, seek a smaller one.

These are the three key insights God showed me in the past six months. Our church visits confirm it. I’m not down on church, but I wonder if today’s church has lost its way.

Contemplating this, I blogged, asking “What Is Church?“:

“Church isn’t about message or music. Those are often distractions or settling for less than the best. True church is about community, where we are all priests, with each one giving and receiving, mutually edifying and encouraging one another on our faith journey.”

I’m sure we’ll learn more on the second half of our journey. I can’t wait for what else God has planned for us.

Takeaway for Everyone: True church is about community. The message and music are secondary—and may even distract from what really matters.

[Check out the discussion questions for this post.]

My wife and I visited a different Christian Church every Sunday for a year. This is our story. Get your copy of 52 Churches today, available in ebook, paperback, hardcover, and audiobook.

Peter DeHaan writes about biblical Christianity to confront status quo religion and live a life that matters. He seeks a fresh approach to following Jesus through the lens of Scripture, without the baggage of made-up traditions and meaningless practices.

Read more in his books, blog, and weekly email updates.

 

Categories
Visiting Churches

52 Churches: Part One Perspective

Here’s an Overview After Visiting Our First 13 Churches

We’re one-quarter of the way through our journey. It’s been more than what I’d hoped for and at the same time, not as much of what I expected.

In attending the churches closest to home in our rural, white, middle-class area I expected little racial diversity, and we saw even less.

Although I could assume our few local minorities don’t go to church, it’s more likely they aren’t attending the ones nearby. This lack of racial diversity reflects poorly on the nearly all-white churches we’ve visited.

52 Churches: A Yearlong Journey Encountering God, His Church, and Our Common Faith

Despite areas of concern, I liked each of the thirteen churches and, if needed, any one could become my church home, though some would take much more effort than others.

Notable and Intriguing Churches

But finding a new church isn’t our goal. Our mission is to expand our worship of God and meet our extended Christian family. Still, three churches grab my attention:

Church #7 (The New Church) draws me. I like that they’re truly nondenominational and unaffiliated. Even more, I appreciate their many unchurched and under-churched attendees, as well as their goal of growing deeper.

As a bonus, they recently moved and are now the third closest church to our home, a scant 1.4 miles away. Their community calls me.

Both United Methodist churches hold an appeal, but the second one, Church #12 (More Methodists, More Food), edges out the first.

This is in part because they’re in our rural area, whereas the first, although slightly closer to our home, has more affinity with the nearby city I’ve become weary of driving to.

I also really like the pastor there. Her quiet reverence in leading worship guides me into God’s presence like nothing I’ve ever enjoyed at church.

The United Methodist Church, however, periodically relocates its ministers, and I wonder if I’d still feel drawn to the church once they reassign her. She’s already been there six and a half years, and I suspect she’ll move on soon.

Church #5 (Catholics are Christians Too) has a pull for me, likely because they’re an enigma. There’s much I could learn from them about worshiping God.

Unfortunately, their service isn’t accessible to outsiders, and it would be hard to make friends there since there’s little community.

Additionally, I’d like to make repeat visits to Church #3 (It Only Hurts When You Care) and Church #8 (A Grand Experiment).

For the first one, I want to witness a typical service there, whereas for the second, I wonder if I’d still be as interested in their community after a second visit. I fear I wouldn’t, so maybe it’s best not to return.

Candy says that out of the thirteen, Church #2 (Growing Deeper, Not Wider) is her preference. It, too, has a strong draw for me. This makes sense as its worship style and age demographics are the most like our home church.

My only concern is that their doctrine is much narrower than mine, and I fear I would soon chafe under its teaching.

Key Observations

Overall, and most disconcerting, is the correlation I’ve seen between the members’ age and dress compared to their facility and worship style.

If you show me the building and service, I’ll predict the audience’s age and what they’ll wear. Alternately, tell me the age and attire of attendees, and I’ll predict the type of service and even the character of the facility.

The question is causality. Does an aging congregation produce a traditional service in a dated facility or does a traditional service in a dated facility attract an older crowd?

Conversely, does a younger or multigenerational gathering create a contemporary service in a nontraditional setting or does a contemporary service in a nontraditional setting attract a younger or multigenerational crowd?

Instead of wondering which caused what, the greater insight is to simply note a connection between attendee age and service style. I suspect the two go together.

Older congregations with traditional services face a deadly downward spiral, with one feeding into the other, which only exacerbates the trend.

I see no long-term hope for these aging congregations and no realistic way to rejuvenate them—aside from supernatural intervention. Pray that God will intervene.

Parting Thoughts

So far, this adventure has been great. Part of me doesn’t want it to end after fifty-two weeks, as there are a couple hundred churches within easy driving distance, but another part of me wonders if I have the stamina to persevere to the end.

Added to this are churches that warrant repeat visits. I also wonder what I might learn about Christianity by visiting non-Christian faith gatherings.

Despite that, I also miss having regular community with close friends.

With all this in mind, we press on.

Takeaway for Everyone: Many churches operate as they always have, unaware that society has changed and seeks something different. The future of these congregations is in jeopardy.

[Check out the discussion questions for this post.]

My wife and I visited a different Christian Church every Sunday for a year. This is our story. Get your copy of 52 Churches today, available in ebook, paperback, hardcover, and audiobook.

Peter DeHaan writes about biblical Christianity to confront status quo religion and live a life that matters. He seeks a fresh approach to following Jesus through the lens of Scripture, without the baggage of made-up traditions and meaningless practices.

Read more in his books, blog, and weekly email updates.

Categories
Visiting Churches

52 Churches Infographic

Learn More about 52 Churches

Discover more in the 52 Churches infographic to see key insights and data about the churches my wife and I visited in a year as covered in my book 52 Churches .

52 Churches infographic, from the book 52 Churches, by Peter DeHaan

Click on the above image to get a better look or download your own copy of the 52 Churches infographic.

Whether or not you’ve read the book, check out this insightful 52 Churches infographic about visiting fifty-two churches in a year for a quick visual overview of key findings.

Here’s a bit about our adventure:

My wife and I visited a different church every Sunday for a year. This book is our story.

52 Churches is part religious exposé, part travel memoir, and 100% authentic. Peter refuses to hold back his punches. You’ll cringe when this Christian author is singled out by a fire-and-brimstone preacher, unnecessarily determined to save his soul out of hell. You’ll find yourself thankful that you weren’t in Peter’s shoes when the pastor told his congregation to greet one another with a holy kiss.

You’ll read about Christian practices that are far different from your own, and in the process gain a deeper understanding of believers from all walks of life and denominational backgrounds: Protestant mainline, evangelical, and charismatic, Roman Catholic, and more.

Discover just how vast, diverse, and amazing Jesus’s church is.

My wife and I visited a different Christian Church every Sunday for a year. This is our story. Get your copy of 52 Churches today, available in ebook, paperback, hardcover, and audiobook.

Peter DeHaan writes about biblical Christianity to confront status quo religion and live a life that matters. He seeks a fresh approach to following Jesus through the lens of Scripture, without the baggage of made-up traditions and meaningless practices.

Read more in his books, blog, and weekly email updates.

Categories
Visiting Churches

An Organizational Metamorphosis

We’ll Bypass Visiting This Church (For Now)

So far, we’ve visited twelve churches.

With one exception—a spiritual community that wasn’t exclusively Christian—we’ve faithfully attended every church on our list, according to their distance from home.

52 Churches: A Yearlong Journey Encountering God, His Church, and Our Common Faith

As our journey continues, we’ll skip some to maximize the breadth of our experience.

The first church we’re skipping is a mainstream denomination church. There are two reasons: We’ve visited this church several times before with a family member.

Second, the church has been struggling of late and is embarking on an organizational metamorphosis. They are in a time of transition from which a new church will hopefully emerge.

This new gathering will have a fresh perspective, a different pastor, and a new name. They will be reborn. Since this is all in the planning stage, we’ll set this church aside.

If their transformation progresses, we’ll visit later. And if this strategy doesn’t work, there will be nothing left to see.

It’s a tough time for the faithful few who remain. I pray for a successful organizational metamorphosis.

Takeaway for Everyone: Every church will at some time struggle. Make sure that season doesn’t turn away visitors.

[Update: though it took a while, we do eventually visit this church. I call it a reboot. I think it was worth the wait. Read about that experience.]

My wife and I visited a different Christian Church every Sunday for a year. This is our story. Get your copy of 52 Churches today, available in ebook, paperback, hardcover, and audiobook.

Peter DeHaan writes about biblical Christianity to confront status quo religion and live a life that matters. He seeks a fresh approach to following Jesus through the lens of Scripture, without the baggage of made-up traditions and meaningless practices.

Read more in his books, blog, and weekly email updates.

Categories
Visiting Churches

Getting Started Visiting 52 Churches

Apprehension about Visiting Our First Congregation

It’s Sunday morning, and we’ve yet to visit our first church. Even though it’s only been a week, I already miss my friends at our church. I already miss what I know and expect, even though I know to expect the unexpected.

At least the unexpected happens in a familiar place and with friends.

As an introvert who excels at social awkwardness, I relish familiar surroundings. Going somewhere new produces a deep fear I yearn to avoid. I have driven into a parking lot at a new place, panicked, and driven away.

Instead of fighting fear, I prefer to flee it. I understand panic attacks. It takes prayer and God’s help to subdue them.

I get up around 6 a.m., as usual, but Church #1 doesn’t start for five hours. That’s far too much time for me to wait. I wonder, and I worry. Doubt creeps in. My fear grows.

If only the service started earlier. Then there wouldn’t be as much time for the enemy to whisper his lies: “This is a stupid idea.” “You will fail.” “No one will read your book.”

52 Churches: A Yearlong Journey Encountering God, His Church, and Our Common Faith

I must resist the devil, so he will flee from me (see James 4:7).

Or at least I can distract myself by working on this chapter. My insides churn with equal parts excitement and fear—or perhaps it’s just the sausage pizza from last night.

It doesn’t help that my bed provided more restlessness than rest. I add “tired” to my growing list of reasons not to go.

I now understand why the non-regular church attender can so easily stay home despite their best intentions. The living room recliner and television remote are much more inviting and much less threatening.

Yet I press on. This isn’t due to my character but to avoid embarrassment. Too many people know about this project for me to abort my mission on day one.

The first of fifty-two churches is a small one in an old building. I know nothing about them, even though they’re a scant one mile from home.

For years, we’ve driven past their tiny church, yet I’ve never met anyone who went there. How strange. We’ve lived in this community for nearly a quarter of a century, and my connection to it goes back even further.

I know people from the other local churches, why not here?

Does anyone actually go to this one?

Learning about them online isn’t an option. They don’t have a website or even a Facebook page.

Candy and I discuss when we should leave but don’t agree.

We don’t want to breeze in at the last minute, removing any opportunity for pre-service interaction. Yet, arriving too early opens us to awkwardness if there’s no one to talk to, leaving us with nothing to do but squirm.

We pray before heading out. I ask God to bless our time at church and teach us what he wants us to learn. I request his favor, so we can have a positive impact on this church and the people there. We say “amen,” and then we leave.

Candy shows no apprehension, and I doubt she’s aware of mine. She keeps our conversation light. In the two-minute drive, there’s no time for my angst to grow. Before I know it, we’re there.

My palms grow sweaty and my heart pounds. Nausea overtakes me.

What have I gotten us into?

Takeaway for Everyone: Make it as easy for visitors as possible. Providing helpful information online is critical: what to expect, how to dress, a theological overview, and any distinctive characteristics.

[Check out the discussion questions for church #1.]

Learn what happens next when we visit our first church.

My wife and I visited a different Christian Church every Sunday for a year. This is our story. Get your copy of 52 Churches today, available in ebook, paperback, hardcover, and audiobook.

Peter DeHaan writes about biblical Christianity to confront status quo religion and live a life that matters. He seeks a fresh approach to following Jesus through the lens of Scripture, without the baggage of made-up traditions and meaningless practices.

Read more in his books, blog, and weekly email updates.

Categories
Visiting Churches

How It All Began: A Holy Spirit Prompting

An Introduction to 52 Churches

“Where do you go to church?”

Oh, how I dread that question.

It isn’t that I don’t go to church or am too embarrassed to answer. Instead, my frustration comes from the scowls I receive as I fumble through my reply. No matter what I say, I cause confusion.

This question about church attendance comes from clients at the local food pantry, where I volunteer. The pantry is a community effort started by local businesses, service organizations, and churches.

Now staffed mostly by church members, church attendance is a common topic of our patrons.

I serve as the point person for the clients. I explain our process, guide them through the paperwork, and match them with a volunteer to help them shop. As we move through these steps, we often chat.

This is when the awful question about where I go to church comes up.

The problem is that I don’t attend any of the churches that support the pantry. Instead, my wife, Candy, and I drive some fifteen miles to a church in another community.

Though I long to worship God in the community where we live, he has sent me to one further away and less convenient.

Sometimes I explain all this, but the clients’ eyes glaze over, either in boredom or bewilderment. Other times I only share the name of our church, but no one recognizes it.

Since it’s not a typical church name, they wonder if I’m kidding. Occasionally, I change the subject, but they don’t like that either.

Eventually, I realize they ask because they’re looking for a church.

Sure, some people are being polite, others feel obligated to ask—since nearly all our volunteers go to church, and a few want to label me based on my church affiliation. But most of them just want to find a spiritual community to plug into.

The pantry’s mandate is to serve residents of our local school district, which has ten churches within its borders. I don’t know a thing about some of them.

I know a little bit about each of the five churches involved with the pantry, but I don’t know enough to answer folks’ questions or direct them to the best match for their needs and background.

What if I visited all ten? Then I could better help clients who were looking for a church.

Yet, it isn’t that simple. What about churches just outside the school district? Should I consider nearby congregations too?

In addition to the ten within our school district, five more are a few miles to the southwest, twenty-one to the west, and scores more to the east.

A Lifelong Practice

All my life, I’ve gone to church. This has been a regular practice, pursued with dogged determination.

Yet, in considering the churches I’ve attended—first with my parents, next by myself, and then with my family—our church of choice was seldom the nearest one.

Why don’t we go to church where we live? This is a deep desire of my heart: to live, worship, and serve in the same community.

In addition to being practical in terms of time, effort, and cost, worshiping locally would also provide more opportunity to connect with and form a faith community in our geographic community, not somebody else’s.

Another perplexing question is wondering why each of our church-attending neighbors goes to a different one.

I long to worship God with my neighbors. Are the forms of our faith so different that we can’t go to church together? The answer should be “no,” but the evidence proves otherwise.

My hunch is that each possible church opportunity offers a fresh perspective of pursuing God or perhaps a different understanding of what it means to worship him.

If I can learn from each one, my comprehension of the God I love will grow and my understanding of worshiping him will be enhanced.

These reasons propel me forward, to undertake my unconventional faith journey of visiting different churches.

This isn’t the first time I wondered about the practices of other churches.

My grandmother went to a Baptist church. It was so different from the mainline one I attended that as a young child I thought she was a borderline heathen or perhaps part of a cult.

I was even more concerned about the girl next door, my only consistent friend for the first ten years of my life. She went with her family to a Roman Catholic parish and attended a parochial school.

Based on misinformation from people who didn’t understand Catholicism—or perhaps didn’t care to—I was convinced she was on her way to hell. She likely thought the same thing about me. I assumed I was on the side of right, and she, on the side of wrong.

The idea that we could both be right was beyond my comprehension. I even wondered how I might convert her to my church practices, not knowing we both looked to the same God, just in different ways.

When my family moved, my exposure to Catholics increased. In middle school art class, where the teacher had no clue what went on in her room, some classmates started arguing about Purgatory when we were supposed to be making art.

A group of us ditched our projects to debate the issue. We aligned our teams on opposite sides of a rectangular table. We stared at each other until I framed why we sat there glaring at each other. “Is there Purgatory?”

“Yes,” answered the other side of the table.

“No,” came the retort from my side.

No one said anything more. We each had our opinions, but we lacked support.

The debate ended without any discussion and without a winner. We slunk away from the table.

It bothered me that I couldn’t defend my unexamined position and that I learned nothing about Purgatory. How could Christians—who all claim to follow Jesus—hold such polarized opinions over the same faith?

The Same Team

I was a voracious reader, and my grandmother kept me supplied with a steady flow of books, all from a Baptist perspective.

This influenced me significantly during my formative years, causing me to wrestle greatly in attempting to reconcile a traditional Christian mindset with evangelical teaching.

Later, I discovered the Holy Spirit—the third part of the Trinity that mainline and conservative Christians downplay, sometimes even dismiss. I immersed myself in a pursuit of the charismatic.

We’re all on the same team, I lamented. Why can’t we get along?

This so vexed me that, years later, when it came time to select my dissertation topic I had no hesitation. I chose Christian unity.

My imperative need to learn why we were different and to advocate Christian harmony became even more urgent as I studied Jesus’s prayer in John 17, which he uttered just prior to his capture and execution.

With an agonizing death only hours away, Jesus took time to pray. His final request was that all his future followers would get along. He knew the impact of his sacrifice would be lessened if those who later professed to follow him lived in conflict with each other.

Now, with my dissertation complete, I have a theoretical understanding of the need for unity.

Despite that, I lack the practical knowledge of how the different streams of Protestants express their faith and worship God. And I’m completely ignorant about the rest of Christianity.

A Holy Spirit Prompting

As I wonder what to do with my idea of visiting area churches to better inform myself and help the food pantry clients, God prompts me to pursue a grander vision.

At his leading, I plan an unconventional faith journey, one of adventure and discovery: to learn what he would show me by visiting a different Christian church every Sunday for a year. I eventually call my sojourn “52 Churches.”

Oh, how this vision resonates with me. All my life I’ve yearned for more, spiritually. More from church, more from its community, and more from our common faith.

I’ve searched for answers, answers to impertinent questions I can sometimes barely articulate.

Yet something deep inside compels me to ask them, even though I confound others every time I do. A primal urge forces me to reach for this spiritual “more,” one I know to exist, as surely as I know my own name.

I dare to extend my arms toward God and have the audacity to expect him to reciprocate, perhaps even touching the tip of my outstretched fingers.

We’re content to drink Kool-Aid when God offers us wine. (This is an unlikely metaphor for me to use since I don’t drink alcohol—except for the occasional communion service that serves it.) Yes, there is more.

So much more. I’m desperate to discover it—and visiting fifty-two churches offers the potential to uncover more—or at least get me closer. This is something I must do. For me, this is no longer an option but a requirement.

My faith demands it. My spiritual sanity requires it.

This adventure earns the support of my wife and willing accomplice; my pastor, who encourages me to move forward; and my fellow elders who, after initial apprehension, support me, even anticipating what I will learn and share.

This isn’t a church-shopping romp, looking for a perfect faith community. Instead, I seek to broaden my understanding of God, church, and faith by experiencing different spiritual practices.

To do this, Candy and I will take a one-year sabbatical from our home church, intent on returning, armed with a greater understanding of how to better connect with the God we love, worship, and serve.

Yet I realize God might have other plans. He could tell us to join one of the churches we visit. He might instruct us to extend our quest or end it early.

He could fundamentally change our understanding of church and our role in it. Or perhaps things might work out as we plan, with us simply returning to our home church, one year later, better equipped to worship and serve.

Along the way, I suspect each church will show us a different approach to encountering God. I’m determined to learn what I can each week to increase my comprehension of him and enhance my worship.

I want to expand my understanding of our common faith, and I expect to boost my appreciation for the diversity of the local branches of Jesus’s church.

Whatever the outcome, I know God will teach us much, and I intend to come back well-armed with helpful information for the clients at the food pantry.

As I tell close friends about my plan—actually, it’s God’s plan—many resonate with it. This isn’t just a journey for me but for us all, albeit vicariously for most. This isn’t one man’s narcissistic pursuit.

It is an adventure for all who sense a need for more.

  • To those disenfranchised with church: This is a journey of hope and rediscovery. Don’t give up on church. God has a place in it for you. Yes, church can be messy at times, and the easy reaction is to give up.

    Maybe church left you disappointed, or her members hurt you beyond comprehension, but there are many people, at many churches, ready to offer love and extend acceptance.

    Don’t let a bad incident, or two, cause you to miss a lifetime of spiritual connection with others. I pray this book will call you back to Christian community.
  • To spiritual seekers: You have a place in God’s family. I’ll share fifty-two ways to expand your perspective. Diligently seek God as you explore churches, and you will find him. But don’t shop for a church as a consumer.

    Instead, travel as a pilgrim on a faith journey, seeking fellow sojourners to walk beside you. I pray the end of this story will mark the beginning of yours.
  • To the inquisitive: The church of Jesus is bigger, broader, and vaster than most of us have ever considered. Here, I share fifty-two reasons why, fifty-two variations of one theme.

    I pray you will begin to ask brave questions about church practices, explore fresh ways to worship God, and accept those who hold different understandings.
  • To church leaders: I offer a narrative to help you reach out more effectively, embrace more fully, and love more completely.

    You’re sure to catch glimpses of your church reflected on these pages, with anecdotes that will cause you to smile—and to groan—with each impression offering insight to those willing to accept it.

    May this book serve as your primer to celebrate what you do well and improve what you could do better. I pray this will mark a new beginning for your local branch of Jesus’s church.
  • To advocates of Christian unity: We’re part of the church Jesus began. It’s time everyone embraces this reality.

    I pray this account will encourage you to pursue greater unity in Jesus, to help churches in your area work together for God’s glory, so that everyone will know the Father, just as Jesus prayed (John 17:20–26).

    Another word for Christian unity is ecumenical: Of or relating to the worldwide Christian church.
52 Churches: A Yearlong Journey Encountering God, His Church, and Our Common Faith

My Wife Joins Me on This Adventure

Candy compiles a list of churches within ten miles of our home. She initially identifies fifty-seven, but we keep discovering more. Our file eventually balloons to ninety churches located within a ten-mile drive.

Not on the list is our own church, an outlier congregation that is part of a small mainline denomination, even though many assume we’re nondenominational—because that’s how we act.

God told me to help start this church. He called me to go there. Despite aching to attend church closer to home, he hasn’t released me to do so.

To realize the most from our sojourn, we form a plan. We’ll visit those churches nearest our home first, picking them in order of driving distance.

Toward the end of our journey, we’ll choose other churches from the remaining list, visiting those most different from our norm. Making the list is the easy part.

Next, we set some guidelines. Each week, we’ll check their website, hoping to learn about them before our visit so we can more fully embrace our time there.

Still, knowing that websites are sometimes out-of-date, we’ll email or call to verify service times. (Candy faithfully handled this every week for the entire year.)

If there are multiple meetings, we’ll go to the later one, since second services, which usually have a higher attendance, possess more energy, and lack time constraints.

We’ll dress casually, as we normally do, for church. For me this means a T-shirt, shorts, and tennis shoes in the summer and a casual shirt, jeans, and boots in the winter.

This is practical because my wardrobe best allows it. It will also help because casual attire is what a non-churched visitor would likely wear.

Though I don’t want to come off as an unchurched outsider, I’ll learn more if they don’t view me as a conformed insider.

We agree to go along with any visitor rituals, but we’ll do nothing to imply we might come back or consider joining their community. If they want to give us literature or welcome gifts, we’ll graciously accept them.

When asked why we’re visiting, we’ll be honest, saying we’re seeking to expand our understanding of worshiping God by visiting area churches—but we aren’t looking to join one.

Also, we’ll avoid showing up at the last minute, instead aiming to arrive ten minutes early. This will allow for possible pre-church interaction.

Afterward, we’ll look for opportunities to talk with people and will stay for any after-church activities—except Sunday school.

This is because the original purpose of Sunday school was to teach poor children how to read. By the time public schools took over this task, Sunday school had become an institution and continued as an expected requirement.

At most churches Sunday school is now little more than an obligatory expectation, where frustrated faculty seek to fill time that antsy children strive to avoid.

Too many Sunday school programs bore their students and effectively teach kids that faith is boring.

However, aside from Sunday school, as we visit churches, we’ll do our best to be open and approachable, interacting with others any way we can.

Perhaps most important, we’ll participate in their service to the degree we feel comfortable, while being careful not to push their boundaries.

For more exuberant expressions of worship this means we’ll have the freedom, but not the obligation, to follow their lead. For more reserved gatherings, we won’t do anything to alarm them with our behavior.

I’ll blog about our visits, but I won’t keep the dispassionate distance of a reporter. I’ll engage in the service and with their community.

Throughout our adventure, I will continue to participate in a twice-a-month, midweek gathering at our home church. It is a nurturing faith community where we encourage and challenge each other.

This will serve as my spiritual base during our sojourn and help keep me connected. I’ll also listen to our church’s sermon podcasts and attend elder meetings.

As friends pray for our journey, one asks that we make a positive impact on each church we visit. This surprises me. I strive to make a difference wherever I go, but I never considered it for 52 Churches.

I assumed we would receive, but I never considered how we might give. With an expanded perspective, our adventure becomes doubly exciting.

Talk is safe. Action is risky. It’s easy to consider a bold move in the indefinite future. But I need to pick a date, or this will never be anything more than an intriguing idea that never happens.

It’s the season of Lent, and our church is marching toward Easter. What if we start our journey after that? I share the timing with my wife.

I expect resistance—or perhaps, I hope for some—providing an excuse for delay. But she nods her agreement. My pastor and fellow elders also affirm the timing. Some are envious.

Candy and I celebrate Jesus’s resurrection with our home church. Then we slip away to begin our sojourn the following Sunday.

I expect this to be an amazing adventure, and I invite you to journey with us.

My wife and I visited a different Christian Church every Sunday for a year. This is our story. Get your copy of 52 Churches today, available in ebook, paperback, hardcover, and audiobook.

Peter DeHaan writes about biblical Christianity to confront status quo religion and live a life that matters. He seeks a fresh approach to following Jesus through the lens of Scripture, without the baggage of made-up traditions and meaningless practices.

Read more in his books, blog, and weekly email updates.

Categories
Visiting Churches

The Postcard Church

The Allure of Something Fresh

After a year or so of attending The Nonconventional Church, we receive a series of captivating postcards about a new church that will soon launch in our community. I soon call them the Postcard Church.

I’m intrigued and want to learn more. My wife doesn’t.

Shopping for Church: Searching for Christian Community, a Memoir

Though they’re part of a denomination, I’m willing to overlook that fact if they deliver what they promise. But their denominational affiliation is a sticking point for Candy. I get that.

So, we continue to attend The Nonconventional Church. I like everything about it and what they do—except for their music and their message. Neither draws me. Yet the allure of post-service community calls me.

I especially like the monthly potluck. I most anticipate sharing a meal with other believers and sharing life with them around the table. It’s the highlight of my month. Seriously.

Yet the food prep falls to my bride, and she wearies of it, which I comprehend. When she complains, I offer to handle it, but we both know that’s a bad idea. It’s her kitchen, and I need to stay out of it when she’s around.

Though I ably make meals when she isn’t present, the outcome is never good if she’s there to watch what I do. And the only time I could prepare for our Sunday potluck is when she’s home.

So, she continues to handle it, but it becomes a growing point of contention. The part I like best about our church is the part she likes the least.

Change in Plans

One week our daughter-in-law says she wants to visit The Postcard Church. She invites us to go with them. I know how hard it is to visit a new church, and I sense she’s looking for some support on their first visit.

With the pressures of work, life, and a growing family, their church attendance has become sporadic. Though they call The Rural Church their church home, they seldom go anymore. I think it’s been months.

The Postcard Church is in our community, meeting in the local middle school. Based entirely on their marketing materials, I’m excited to see what we’ll encounter.

Our daughter-in-law’s invitation is an excuse to visit this church and an opportunity for us to encourage our kids to plug back into a faith community.

We gladly take a one-week break from our church to help our kids find a spiritual place where they can belong.

Interestingly, The Postcard Church is a site plant of the parent church behind The Multisite Church. This is another location.

This is also the church that approached The Traditional Denominational Church seeking to work with them to expand their outreach to the community. In the end, that church turned them down, opting to continue pursuing their own path.

The Postcard Church is three-quarters of a mile from our home. Though we could walk, we opt to drive. We’ll meet our children and grandchildren there.

The church is a satellite location of an established church in the area. Unlike most satellite churches, they offer the music and message live. Their parent church provides centralized governance and financial oversight.

They meet at the local middle school, an arrangement I applaud.

Instead of investing money in a building that’s only fully used a few hours each week and only fractionally used during business hours, they free up money to invest in outreach and ministry.

Though they pay a rental fee, that’s much less than the cost to own and maintain a building. Besides the cost element, this arrangement provides flexibility if they outgrow the space.

As we drive up, the church’s trailer sits alongside the driveway, smartly doubling as a sign for the church and signaling the proper entrance. Renting space from a school means they need to set up and tear down each Sunday.

The large trailer doubles as a transportation unit on Sunday and storage space throughout the week for their equipment and supplies.

We drive past the trailer. A large vertical welcome banner shows us where to park and which entrance to use, staffed with two smiling greeters.

We talk a bit. Once inside there’s no question about where to go.

A portable sign tells us to turn right for the service, though the nursery and some children’s programs are to the left. We veer right and find ourselves in a large open space, with people mingling about.

As we move forward, two men interrupt their conversation to talk to us, something I seldom witness at the churches we visit.

They share their names, and we give ours, connecting with them as we do. After a while we thank them for their time and move into the worship space, a typical middle school gym.

In the middle are folding chairs set in three sections, with one hundred chairs per section. We sit as we wait for the rest of our family to arrive, which they soon do.

With the overhead lights off, we rely on indirect lighting. The subdued ambiance pleases but makes it hard to read the literature they gave us.

People and excitement fill the space. All age groups show up, but most are younger than us. It’s likely many of the tweens and younger teenagers also attend this school during the week, while their younger siblings will in a few years.

As we wait, soft music plays in the background. People talk with friends. The atmosphere strikes a pleasing balance between churches whose members sit in stoic silence waiting for the service to start and those where frenzied activity overwhelms.

A worship team of five gathers in front. There is a drummer, two on guitars, one on keys, and one backup vocalist. They have no one for bass. The keyboardist doubles as the worship leader.

Four-fifths of their ensemble fit within the millennial generation, with a lone baby boomer.

After the first song, the teaching pastor welcomes us and gives announcements. One is a chance to get to know others in the church.

The idea is simple: three individuals or families get together three times over three months around a shared meal, dessert, or coffee.

This helps people get to know others and form connections. It’s a short-term commitment with a long-term benefit.

The pastor moves us into the greeting time. I interact with four people, but no one else makes any effort. I fidget, longing for this time to end. As church greetings go, this one is neither memorable nor haunting.

Our space is now over half full, which is good for a holiday weekend. We sing some more. I don’t know any of the songs, but I pick up the chorus on most and the verses on a few.

Next is the offering. There’s an information card to fill out and drop in the offering basket, but Candy’s still working on it when the offering gets to us. We’ll turn it in later.

After the collection they slide smoothly into a final song before the sermon.

Despite some empty spaces in the front, they’ve stealthily added more chairs in the back, which are now mostly full. I suspect the attendance pushes three hundred, with a hundred or more kids and their leaders elsewhere in the facility.

Belong, Believe, Become

It’s week three of a three-part series: “Belong, Believe, Become.” Today is about becoming. As I contemplate his teaching, I jot down a profound phrase: “Know your community.”

This makes sense. If we’re going to reach our neighbors, we need to better understand them.

He gives us a simple three-point process to engage people: Step one is to talk to them. Step two is to ask them a question. Step three is to invite them for a meal, an outing, or a service opportunity. Most people are open to an invitation to do something.

He concludes with an encouragement to build church where we are.

The service ends. Many people pick up their chair, collapse it, and stow it on a nearby rack. Others come up to us to talk. We enjoy these conversations, which are friendly and engaging.

 After doing my part to pick up our family’s chairs, we move back into the lobby. There we turn in our information cards to the visitor center and enjoy an extended time of conversation with a most engaging woman.

She tells us about the church. I ask how next Sunday’s service will compare to this holiday weekend experience. The woman says the service will be the same format, but there will be many more people. I wonder how many more.

We could return next week to find out. In two weeks, they’ll have an after-church event for people who want to learn more about their gathering.

This church has much to offer, but we’ll miss it since we’ll be back at The Nonconventional Church.

I long to go to church in my community and attend with my neighbors. This church meets the first criteria, but I don’t spot any neighbors.

The four of us debrief at lunch. We all had a positive experience at the Postcard Church.

Our grandson, however, struggled in nursery, with the director of children’s programming holding him the entire time. The two of them bonded, which so touched his mother’s heart.

“We’re coming back next week,” she announces. “Do you want to come with us?”

We agree.

Takeaway

Giving first-time visitors a positive experience is key to having them come back.

Read the full story in Peter DeHaan’s new book Shopping for Church.

Travel along with Peter and his wife as they search for a new Christian community in his latest book, Shopping for Church, part of the Visiting Churches Series.

This book picks up the mantle from 52 Churches, their year-long sabbatical of visiting churches.

Here’s what happens:

My wife and I move. Now we need to find a new church. It’s not as easy as it sounds. She wants two things; I seek three others.

But this time the stakes are higher. I’ll write about the churches we visit, and my wife will pick which one we’ll call home. It sounds simple. What could possibly go wrong?

Peter DeHaan writes about biblical Christianity to confront status quo religion and live a life that matters. He seeks a fresh approach to following Jesus through the lens of Scripture, without the baggage of made-up traditions and meaningless practices.

Read more in his books, blog, and weekly email updates.